Symmetrical dating

Symmetry (the definition is from  Merriam Webster Dictionary )

balanced proportions; also : beauty of form arising from balanced proportions or having similarity in size, shape, and relative position of corresponding parts.When two halves of an object are mirror images of each other.

So,  I had been chatting back and forth with Mr. H for few weeks. Mr. H is  divorced, 44, has a good sense of humor and so far he  has not asked for a "web cam" viewing or any  of those things that make me want to block him.

At some point we exchanged  mobile numbers, spoke on the phone one time and mainly stayed in touch via emails/chats. Perfect . No phone stalking.

We decided to meet for coffee .We chatted on the messenger right before we were gonna meet . Mr. Dater asked me what i was gonna wear. Maybe  he is particular about the dress code, didn't want to over dress or under dress . Told him i was wearing a jeans and a T-shirt. He asked me about the colour . "black Tshirt " i said.

Mr. Dater showed in  Dark Blue Jeans and a black linen shirt that looked very neat. He looked like he stepped out of a photo shoot for the summer line of  one of the casual designers. Cool. had a good time, chatting about  the usual things, nothing too personal .

Few days Later , we agreed on meeting again. Right before i was getting ready to get dressed he came on the messenger and asked me "what are you gonna wear ?". I had not thought that far yet, had to decide  that very minute coz he HAD to know. "jeans and a printed floral t-shirt." I said. There was  no typing on the other end, then my phone rang. H was calling. "would you please  wear a solid colour ?, I think solid colours  would look better on you". Wow, a man who knows about what to wear and what looks good. OK , i can live with that. SO be it. I  told him i will wear a green  blouse and black pants.

We met  at the cafe , he walked in wearing  jet black jeans and a green polo shirt. The man looks good in any colour, i was thinking to myself.

A couple of days later , i was having coffee with my best friend . H called me and asked me if  he can have coffee with us ,I said OK . He  said he was going to come  in  half an hour he just needs to change quickly and come over. "what are you wearing ?" he asked , "jeans and a  purple shirt" i said.

After i hung up, my friend asked ' why is he asking what are you wearing ?" Good question . I have no answer.

He showed up  in time, dressed in washed jeans and this  very dark purple   linen shirt ,sleeves rolled up. Damn, this dude knows  how to dress.

We had a great time. He stayed for  half an hour then left .My  friend  and I sat there chatting.

My friend said "He wears the same colours that you wear, that's why he asks you what are you wearing".

Mmm, i hadn't  really figured  that out till that point. Its kind of cute in a way but also creepy.

A couple of more dates over coffee went exactly the same way. Me, being me, i just couldn't   not mention it.

Sipping coffee on  our last date ,  i said to him " Its amazing how you always come wearing the same colours like i am '.  Mr. H  gave me this huge smile and said " Symmetry is  the way  for a perfect life".

Symmetry, not for me . I go with Chaos wholeheartedly.

No symmetrical dating for me.

Maths, Biology & Art

WHY does  someone lie on the physical description  they right about themselves (body description), especially if that person is constantly nagging to meet up? Could it be that when he wrote the profile he  did not think that far ahead, or maybe was hoping the lady would be blinded by his charm and wont notice , or simply plain good old fashioned stupidity.

I have not figured an  answer other than the simple fact that everybody lies. Here is a simple dating incident.

Most of the sites in the physical description part ask you to chose , height, wight, etc. Some of them ask a figure  while others have a selection of  words that you chose from.

So here i am going on a date with  Mr. Dater with the following attributes

Athletic (Plz note that there are other options like Average,  ample , a little extra padding, Big and tall )

190 cms (of course there are all the height options you can think of )

Mid tone  (This particular site goes by skin colour , so other options are white, mid tone , dark, black)

I walked into Starbucks and i was  greeted by  someone who is about 175, weighs at least 160 Kgs and is black. I was somewhat shocked, I definitely didn't expect Mr. dater to be short , fat and black.

Don't get me wrong, i am not a racist , i have nothing against fat people or darker skin tone or shorter people. I dont judge people by how they look but am against being lied to. Seriously , did  he think  maybe I wouldn't notice the description was totally different  ?

Anyway, so  he had the guts to ask me "Did  u think i looked like this? ". The man has steel balls, doesn't he ? well, two can play that game. I said "I think you miscalculated your weight perhaps OR mizankom 7`rban , as for the height , a lot of people don't actually know their height " .
He smiled at me , thought i was cute and  funny, till i continued " and your  skin colour is not mid tone, you are as black as possible " . He was shocked or embarrassed maybe. A couple of minutes later i left.

The moral is Truth never kills anyone, lying does.

I know i will say this over and over again; Everybody lies, however, men on dating sites lie more than the average person and think they will get away with it.

what men want

I received a question  from "7ayrana" in an email . She seems to be confused and going through a lot of doubt as to what is happening in the dating scene .
Her question is : What do men  want ?

Dear 7ayrana
Be 7ayrana no more.
I have one word for you "S - E - X". That's the  answer, very simple . No matter what a guy says he wants or thinks he wants, in reality he just wants one thing.

Louis Vuitton Purse

Mr. Dater and  Moi chatted back  & forth . So far , he seemed smart and interesting. He is divorced which qualifies him  for a date over coffee. You know the drill by now, if he is married, then he isn't a potential date.

Mr. Dater  has a wide range of interests, cars, Bikes, musics, movies, world issues and animal planet. .

Anyway, we meet up for coffee in the morning since we both weren't working that day. The cafe was almost empty and the weather was very nice we decided to sit on the tables outside.

here we are, across the table from each other , talking about life, work, family & movies. Time passed quickly and before we know it,  an hour had passed. Mr. Dater looked at his watch and i took that as a sign that means that he is either bored or has things to do and needs to make a move.

Just before i was about to say "shall we leave?', Mr. Dater says " I have always been curious about women's purses", "what do women keep in these big purses?" and his eyes stare at my relatively big purse.

Interesting topic, A lot of men do wonder about purses. Guys can fit everything they need in their pockets whereas women are cursed with carrying bags. So Obviously its not strange or weird for a guy to wonder and ask about purses. Its so big of a matter that Oprah made a whole episode on her show about what women carry in their  purses.

I said'  I obviously have my wallet, a perfume,  a small notepad and pen, tissue paper, a tiny make -up purse and chewing gum"

Nothing prepared me for the words that came out of his lips next .

Mr. Dater  said " You don't have condoms? Should we swing by a pharmacy & pick up some ? I never have unsafe sex".

Moral of the story: When something feels too good to be true, it is actually too good to be true.

The Perfect Nickname

One of the most challenging tasks  is  coming up with a nickname on a dating site.  The nickname says something about you and might very well determine whether someone will view your profile or not. Its the first impression you leave on someone browsing hundreds of nicknames.

A problem that you may encounter is that probably all good nicknames are taken, especially on a popular site. Another problems is that maybe, just maybe ,you are not that smart or creative to come up with a name that leaves a good impression.

The following nicknames  are copied  from one of the dating sites. I didn't edit any or make up any of these nicknames.

Jeekar-bedoun (what are the chances of meeting someone of you are stateless & ugly?)

VivaNotZain (Thanks for the info, I did not know that Viva is not Zain)

Moot3a-200Kd (Very straightforward, المختصر المفيد )

28611011014XX  (The number on the site  did not have the XXs, it was an actual civil ID number)

HotManWayed (  he Hot dude is warning ladies so they know they will be getting a lot of you know what )

3elch (Really , you couldn't think of anything else to represent you ? علج )

M3boochKuwaiti (He must have been having lunch when he was creating his profile)

NBK-CBK (The only place where the two banking giants of Kuwait will exist together is on a dating site)

Qabee7Gedann ( قبيح جدا ... الله يعينك )

ModeerFa7al مدير فحل) -يا ترا بشهاده منو ؟)

Sayrti-Aqsa6 (My car is on installments)- In case any of the ladies out there wants to help with the aqsa6

Madyon-Sa3deeni (A real Cry for help, In debt, help me)

Zooj-al-thalatha (Married twice obviously and looking for lucky number 3)

888666 (This is KFC's home delivery number. The Dude works there or is doing ambush marketing for KFC)

ElvisIsAlive (Thank God Elvis is Alive. All these years i had my doubts).

7azeen7eel (داش الموقع ينكد علي العالم)

Dawa-Ca7a (A cry for help I wonder if is feeling better now )

VeryShort (What is very short ? The man , or the tool?)

CoolGay (I think he meant CoolGuy )

MarinaFM (Another form of ambush marketing. I think Marina FM should pay him for the free ad)

DontTrustMen (The advice is coming from a man, need I say more?)

Uff-Mabee ( ليش داش عيال  اذا مالك خلق)

طيعيني

Although this blog is about dating, and this following story doesn't really qualify as a dating incident but I just had to share it.
A friend of mine visited me today , after returning from Hajj.  I have to say this, my friend is a  lady in her 50s and she is veiled and a very well covered up lady. This introduction is essential  so that you can grasp the shock i had after she told me.
Time: During Hajj
Place : One of the cities where some of the Hajj rituals take place
Victim: Dr. H
Victim #2 : Lady N
 Dr. H is in a taxi, in one of the religious cities in KSA, and she gets in and tells the driver her destination. the taxi driver her tells her the following "طيعيني و اعطيج 30 ريال "
My friend is speechless.  30 Riyals, come on dude. During Hajj ? WTH ??
Dr. H goes back to her hotel room and  tells the story to one of the ladies in her hotel . Lady N has the biggest smile on her  and  tells her " I was offered 100 Riyals from my taxi driver, your cheap".

Pepper spray would have been so appropriate  or perhaps a taser applied  on a very sensitive  body organ.

Don't say a word

Meeting a stranger can be very stressful . You really don't know what to say and what not to say. There is this area of things that remain uncomfortable to talk about. For instance, i wouldn't ask someone how much money they are making , i wouldn't ask him is his car on installments or paid in cash. Financial issues are meant to be private and am sure even a man will agree with me.

That being said, men hate to be asked about their finances, its a "private matter". On the other hand , to men body matters are OK to talk about. Weird , huh?

Mr. Dater who had chatted with me back and forth, and managed  not to ask me to open the web cam (great, right ?). After few weeks of chatting on and off , he asked to meet up  for coffee.  We agreed on a time and a place. He came right on time, very impressive.

He walked right to where i was sitting as the place was empty and i given a good  description of how i look and what i will wear. He sat across the table , took off the sunshades.

Ready for the shock ? The first words that cam out of his mouth were " wow. great  ديود ". "what size  are they? They  are real , right?" . The only thing that he hadn't said is 'can i touch them?'

My jaw dropped. Seriously dude, is this your best dating behaviour? Your conversation starter?

I was still shocked, and he was still staring 12 CMS below my face. Finally ,  I had to tell him we are not talking  ديود talk. He started asking me about my life with his fixed on my ديود
Two  minutes later , i left the place.

The moral of the story : Men talk to boo*s, and will continue to do so because they haven't realised yet that boo*s don't talk. They still stare at them waiting for words  that will never be uttered. Unfortunately , Boo*s don't talk.
The world Boo* is not in its right spelling  as it is a profanity, so the blog isn't allowing me to write in proper spelling in English it. In case you were wondering :)
And if someone is wondering what is ديود , its   woman's breasts.

Word of mouth

I have received a couple of emails  asking me whether these 'incidents' are real or  was I just making them up. Its all true, it al  happened to me or to one of my close friends. Nothing is fictional , nothing is made up.
I would love to post stories that happened to guys. The dating scenes has a lot of funny stories happening to men  .  Feel free to email me any worth mentioning dating incident.

The web cam affair

I don't know about you, but I don't use webcam. I don't switch mine on, and i don't accept video calls even if they were from Oprah Winfrey. There are  a lot of freaks out there and i don't like to take any chances. No offence Oprah.

That being said , i am not a "معقدة" kind of person. I just believe that a photo is as good as a webcam to get to know how the other person looks like. You want to know more, meet the person up and get the real live feed.

On the dating scene , there are these men who are  all about webcam. As soon as someone ads you to their messenger , the first words that they type is "Do you have a webcam?'.

The answer to that question is very tricky. If you say No, well the messenger shows that u have a webcam (which is very stupid of  MSN)  and basically you are caught lying. If you say Yes, then of course "switch your cam on" is the next sentence that you will see  appearing on your chat window from  your chat partner.

The well mannered person in me tries to always be nice and to assume that not everyone who wants to use a webcam is a pervert sitting in their underwear. So i say " i do have a webcam, but i don't think that's the way to know a person, we can chat and if we get along, we meet up for coffee somewhere"

At that point, Mr. Chatter will respond with "انتي معقده منو يتزوجج مدام ابسط شي ما تبين تسوينه" "ترا انا ماقولج تعالي طلعي وياي كلها كام " .

This Scenario has happened so many times that its enough for me to call it a phenomenon. If you don't open your webcam to chatters , immediately you are diagnosed with Webcam Rex, you are officially a psychopath and closed minded . You will never ever date or marry and  you will miss your chance on becoming a porn movie star with tens of Youtube videos. That's something i will  live to  regret, or maybe not.

It's a matter of Trust

The song , Its a matter of trust by  Billy Joe is a  great songs.  I love  it.
(Here is the link , in case you want to listen to it while you continue reading)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yYchgX1fMw

Trust is a big issue in life and in dating of course. You need to trust people in order  for them to become credible.  My question is , how long does it take to trust someone, and how does that trust develop between two strangers? Very tricky question . Search no longer for answers. Men on the dating scene have got it figured out.
Apparently you should trust someone for any of the following reasons:
1-  Because they viewed your profile
2-  Because they contacted you
3-  Because they told you  their name, or what kind of car they drive or where they live
4-  If you have met them for coffee

Mr. Dater emailed me back  and forth. Right age group, right marital status, right sense of humor. So, he was eligible for a coffee .
We decided we  were meeting at one of the cafes one evening time . We  had an interesting time, talking about  general things. Interesting to talk to  but not to die for. Then again, we just met , how can i judge based upon an hour of  conversation?
So , walking back to the parking lot to go to my car , he walks me to the car. How sweet, acting like a true gentleman. Very impressive.
He asks me ' what are you doing now?"
Me" Going home  probably watch a movie or do some reading"
Mr. Dater " How about i come watch that movie with you "
Me" No, i don't invite strangers to my house"
Mr. Dater "Strangers . Strangers !!! S T R A N G E R S !!! " (i wish there were sound effects on  the blog so i can make you all hear how that sounded like)- "After  ALL this you are calling me a stranger? How can you ? I am shocked . Shocked AND hurt. You don't trust me after we shared coffee"

Mmm , apparently , i am an untrusting kind of person. Apparently  you are supposed to trust every person in this universe because they have spent an hour chatting with you , or more likely,  because they drink coffee. I guess that's why we have 76 branches of Starbucks in Kuwait. Starbucks is working on improving our trust issue with the over priced coffee. Who would have  known?
Note to Billy Joel : Do modify the words to Its a matter of Starbucks.

4 for the price of one

From my favorite co-dater

Ku- wait-a-minute! dating

Anonymous/Guest/Whatever

4 for the price of one (1)

One time, my galpal and I were driving down the street.  We looked over and a guy was smiling at us; which might have been fine, but his wife and his 2 kids were also in the car.  He proceeded to follow us all the way home, trying to give us his phone number! 

4 for the price of one (2)

On a related note, I was at the gas station a few years ago and a bearded dude pulled up to the pump across from me.  He had 3 women in the car wearing niqab.  He smiled and tried to talk to me,  much to the dismay (apparently) of the 3 veiled women.  I asked him, “Hey, isn’t 3 women enough?” and he replied, “No, and you are beautiful” with a big smile.  I burned rubber outa there.

Am too sexy for my shirt

You know the song "Am too sexy for my shirt" right ? if not , Youtube it and  listen to it.

Mr. Dater who has an  Iranian  Family name common in Kuwait was  two years younger than myself . He is single ,  never been married ( that should have given me a hint , right ?) , works as a marine engineer. He Speaks fluent EEnglish which is great   because its really hard to date someone who doesn't speak English and goes (hah) every time  i use an English name.

We agreed to meet at a restaurant, although that's totally against my policy. I usually prefer starbucks for first dates, keep it short and sweet. Anyway, Mr. Dater insisted we meet at a Posh restaurant .

So here we are  sitting there across the table looking at  each other after we exchanged greetings. Mr. Dater says :"how do u like me ?" - " Am Very good looking aren't I ?" "I am probably the only Kuwaiti with deep green eyes" . The list of self complements went on and on and on. The dude is worse than a girl fishing for compliments on  prom night.

I am , as you know by now , a very well mannered person. I smiled as i listened to Mr. Dater talking about bow beautiful his long fingers, how  sexy his deep voice is, how his full lips are symmetrically shaped. In my head am going " WTF " .

The waiter come  to take our order and Mr. dater asked him to come back. Of course , who would want someone to interrupt them while going on a self praise prolonged session?

Finally after maybe 15 minutes of this self compliment session, he looked at me and said "Honestly , did you think i was this good looking ?" . I smiled,  what can i say ? Then he says " Did you think that someone like YOU could possibly  date someone like Me ? " .

Sitting at the receiving end of this stupid self praise monologue , i was thinking , I will not  just  grab my stuff and leave. Revenge is a must, even if  in a silly way.

So i give Mr, Dater my biggest smile ever, " Lets order shall we? I do want to know  more about you" .I forgot to mention that Mr. Dater doesn't eat chicken. I literally ordered half the menu, all chicken , all the way. I even ordered the dessert . I waited for the food to come. Finally , the food is here  & the waiter came and started bringing one dish after the other. I said 'Bring everything all at once, please".In few minutes,  the food was there on the table ,  food for probably 6 people.

I grabbed my purse and walked out.

Revenge  by over ordering was not bad at all . The bill was probably close to  80 KD almost all in chicken dishes that Mr. Dater wont be eating or taking away in take out packages.

As they say "Revenge is a dish better served cold" ,  cold  and in a variety of chicken dishes. 

Do You live alone ?

From my favorite co-dater

Ku- wait-a-minute! dating

Anonymous/Guest/Whatever

“Do you live alone?”

If you are a single and non-Kuwaiti  woman living in Kuwait, lots of men think that it is acceptable to go back to your place to date.  The #1 question I get asked is “Do you live alone?”  followed by, “why don’t we eat at your place instead?”  No…. because I don’t invite strangers to my home – ever.  And I don’t invite a lot of people that I know well, either.  If I’m ready, I’ll invite you.  If not, don’t ask.  The next step is to get the look of confusion/dismay.  I’m sure that they were all ready to come over and get right to business because (according to the twisted mentality) “it is okay in your culture.”    Emmmmm….. Says who?

The trick here is to flip it:  “Do you live alone?  Where do you live?  Oh, with your family?  What time should I be there for lunch/dinner?”   Nervous laughter from him usually ensues and dude usually says something like, “Uh, but you can’t.  I live with my family!”  So??  What makes you think it is okay to come to my home if I can’t go to yours?  But hey, if it is too much of a problem for you, I am ready for you to take me to a nice restaurant (without a cabina) now….

Flip the dress code

I don't know about you, but usually I like to  leave a good impression.

On my dates , i dress up (not the Kuwaiti style & I don't wear my fur coat  nor my ruffle silk dress either), i wear my favorite perfume , Wear make up (again not the Kuwaiti style). Simple but adequately elegant. So, I am meeting this guy for a  first date . Mr. Dater is a university professor , teaches Poetry (romantic, right? ).  There is something about men who recite poetry  that just captures my attention. It gives this impression of sophistication and intelligence.

Mr. Dater  says to me  while we are deciding on the when/where " I like women who are at ease, natural, No need to dress up and be elaborate . Simplicity is beauty'" . Now, what woman doesn't like hearing these words? Finally , a guy who is about internal beauty and character. The perfect man.

As usual, my date is over coffee. I am waiting for Mr. Dater who arrives right on time . Good job. Nothing  impresses me like a man who comes on time .

Mr. Dater is wearing what seems like jogging pants and a sweatshirt . Not an Adidas or  a Puma. Mr. Dater is wearing a PYJAMA ! the type that looks like a track suite.  To  go with that he is wearing flip flops.

WTF . 

The moral is , If a guy says don't dress up, he is coming in flip flops.

The online dating dictionary

I know if you are reading this blog, then you do read and understand English. What you don't know, is that in the dating world , words and sentences mean something else, nothing is as it seems.

Questions and their meaning

Q Do you live alone  ?

Real meaning :  Will i be able to come and get laid .

Q How old are your children ?

Real meaning : Put them to sleep. I want tocome over &  get laid

Q Do you know how to cook?

Real meaning : Invite  me over b***** i want to get laid

Q What are you wearing now ? (asked  usually late at night)

Real meaning : say you wearing something sexy coz i want to get laid and your not letting me, i might as well fantasize.

Q Don't you get lonely living alone ?

Real meaning : Don't you want to get laid ?

Q you have been single all this time ?

Real meaning : Don't you want to get laid ?

Q R u romantic ?

Real meaning : are you a sex maniac or not ?

Q: Do you want to have dinner ?

Real meaning : Can i have dinner at your place and get laid ?

No matter what the question a man asks, the real meaning is almost always "can I get laid ?"

There are exceptions, very few rare men who don't ask these questions probably coz they just got laid .

More on Online Dating in Kuwait

Received from a co-dater in Kuwait  

Ku- wait-a-minute! dating
Guest writer

Online Dating in Kuwait

This topic could fill an entire blog by itself.  First, everybody is married or a teenager.  The married guys think it is okay to cheat – even to marry temporary or “official” 2^nd wives.  The teenagers believe that age, “aint no thang – just a numba.”   Get used to it.  No one tells the truth.  It’s all games. 

To try to circumvent the married men, the following is an excerpt from my online profile:

Disclaimer: Please - if you are married, just move on. I will find out and I won't be discreet in my displeasure. Love the one your with or divorce and find the one you will.

Disclaimer Subsection A: Definition of "Marriage". The state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law. This does not pertain to "sleeping in another bedroom"; "having sex with her, but thinking of you"; "she's living with her parents, but we're not divorced yet"; "I'm still married, but I don't have a girlfriend right now".

Disclaimer Sub-Section B: Definition of "Divorced": The action or an instance of legally dissolving a marriage. This means that you actually have a divorce decree (piece of paper) by government/law.

For those guys who have clicked the "single" box, when in fact you are either sub-section A or sub-section B above, I am not interested in meeting you. Refer to disclaimer paragraph 1.

Honestly dudes - how reliable can you be if you already have marital obligations? GET REAL. Get divorced. Get on with it.

­­

I have had different profiles on different online dating sites.  What I have found is that the same guys are on most of the sites as well – also with different profile names.  The pool is small.  Some of my girlfriends who are online exchange information with me about the same guys we have dated over the years.

I know of a western woman who got married to a” single Kuwaiti” man she met online.  He’s not Kuwaiti, and married with 9 children.  It was love, they got married anyways.  One of my friends also met him online (supposedly several years before his wife met him) and said that dude was looking for a western wife.  She also said that he couldn’t keep his hands to himself (or that he did actually put his hands on himself when not on her).  Ew

I have caught my friends’ boyfriends searching for women online (and brought it to friends’ attention) and I once dated a Kuwaiti guy who turned out to be my friend’s x-husband (although we think they were still together when I dated him).  It is a small world.

---   ---

“I Forgot my Wallet”

Received from a co-dater in Kuwait  

Ku- wait-a-minute! dating
Guest writer

Nawaf (not his real name – maybe) worked at a bank. He invited me to lunch at LeNotre and asked if I would mind if his friend came. I said I didn’t mind at all.


We had a nice lunch. His friend had to go early. When the bill came, Nawaf, pulled a “I forgot my wallet.” Nissssssche.


I was an idiot and paid. I should have called a taxi and left him twisting.

The music man

The music man earned this blog entry  because he was funny and witty. All his email correspondence was  80s  songs. You must agree with me, that is cute .

His first email "honey , honey, sugar , sugar"

I read and i was wondering , why does this seem familiar, it rings a bell . Its the ABBA song. I thought it was a different tagline  and deserved a reply, not just a reply , a musical one, two can play this game . I wanted to reply and say i am not interested in married men,but that would have ruined the music game !

My reply" hello " - Lionel Richie's song

His reply "Take a chance on me " - Beatles song

My reply "Part time lover?"- A Stevie wonder song

His reply"The winner takes it all"- Abba song

My reply "Tragedy"- Bee Gees famous hit

His reply "I wanna know what love is "  - Foreigner song , from the 80s

My reply "Loving you is a dirt job" Tina Turner

His reply "Mamma Mia"- Abba

My reply "Beat it ' M J

Witty.

Inferno

Ok this is an email exchange between me and Mr.Dater

His email "salam alaikum sister, are you met7ajba?" (Peace upon you sister, are you veiled)

My email "Thank you for writing, no I am not Met7ajba and i am not interested in your profile" ( I am not wearing a headscarf and i am not interested in your profile)

His email " Ra7 albsech Niqab, tegh6een wayhech"( I would make you wear a full cover up with a whole  face cover )

My email "No  you wont. I am not interested in you at all"

His reply "entai ray7a jahanam" (you are going to hell)

My reply "thank you for the info, but  you dont get to decide who goes where "

Moral of email exchange : Mr.Dater AKA BuWahab has a list of people going to hell, in case any of you out there want to  find out where your final destination is .

My name is Bond, Prada Bond

Ian Fleming is the creator of the famous secret agent  character James Bond AKA 007. However, it seems that men are fascinated by 007 in a whole different context.

On few dating sites (not just one), a lot of men's nickname are an alteration on the famous  secret agent's name. So i am not surprised to see (Ahmad_bond , BondQ8i, JamesBondQ8, Q8-007,Bond-bedoon, NomadBond), these are just examples, there is a longer list. Men associate  Bond / 007 with   strength , smartness, intelligence and of course gadgets. The things men THINK girls like.

 Now, what i don't understand is the relation that somehow developed at some point , without Ian Fleming's knowledge, between 007 and designers. Only on a famous Kuwaiti dating site you see nicknames like (LV-007, BondVersace, Dior007 , GucciBond, Gucci007 & Prada007).

These names are all from one site. Actual nicknames for registered users. It makes me wonder, are  men trying to convey a message to designers that they should be more thrilling, design a more on the edge clothing lines ? Or are they conveying a message to the producers of 007 movies to dress up our favorite agent in European latest fashion because his British designed clothes are boring and classic? Or do these users act like James bond and dress up in Versace & Prada ?

Dying to know.

Women are the new men

I am as open minded and non judgmental as they come but female interaction is not my thing.

The dating site that i am on doesn't allow members of the same gender to contact each other. So, if someone wants to do that, they would have to create a profile posing as a member of the opposite sex (a female who wants to contact females, have to create a profile as a guy).  A lot of work, and you have to pay for it as well. Nothing in life comes free, even memberships on dating sites.

A nickname like C-Dior  could be very well used by a guy. There are lots of  cosmopolitan men out there who are into fashion and designer clothes. Nothing , so far , is weird in getting an email from Mr. Dater AKA C-Dior.

I looked at the profile, right age group, tall, & athletic so when a chat request came, i was at my keyboard typing. All me fellow women  know you cant resist a man who is into designers , esp Christian Dior.

Mr. Dater & I start talking .All general stuff, the weather, things to do in Kuwait , TV shows. Mr. Dater loves Christian Dior Saddle purse. Mr. dater also knows that the decent woman does not wear two different colours on her fingernails and toenails. All common beauty knowledge EVERYMAN should know, right ? nothing weird so far ? As a matter of fact , things couldn't be better, a guy who knows about make up , cool  .

BUT when we talk lipstick and a man says that the best red lipstick ever is  Chanel Rouge Hydra base Creme Lipstick in Red N°5, you know something is wrong. Only  a woman would know that  precise information. Mr. C-dior is definitely a Miss Dior.

Merci Mademoiselle Chanel

Cinderella is just a foot away

For those who don't know what is a foot fetish ; its  is an obsession or a fascination with feet / shoes in a erotic way.

Feet lovers are more than we all think. They are in love with feet in a very devoted manner. How do   I know ? take a guess.

Mr. Dater emailed me. Usually people ask, are you living alone ?  Do you have family ? what are  you looking for ? some ask different questions, but all along these boring old fashioned questions.

Mr. Dater's first email said ' what size is your feet? ' . Me , being the naive silly romantic girl thought, OMG, this is Cinderella fairy tale all  over again. My prince is has my crystal slipper.Wait, i am not missing my crystal slipper, as a matter of fact , i don't even have one.

I had to reply to the email., wouldn't you ? so i replied  , giving my shoe size (anxiously waiting). The next email was , "How many pairs do you have ? ". OK , so this  prince is really into shoes, so i replied back "i have never counted them but maybe around 30 pairs".

Waiting for the next email from Price Dater , i had different thoughts but nothing prepared me for  what he said. "Can  I see a picture?"

Me, strict about sending pictures to strangers replied" I don't send my photos to strangers"

Mr. Dater "Oh, you misunderstood. I wanted photos of the shoes"

Duh., of course you did. 

Next.

The kindness of strangers

On  dating sites you run into lots and lots of guys, esp in a country like Kuwait; almost everyone is  online, almost all the time.

I met Mr.B is on a dating site, powerful and married. My profile  is clear, I do not date married men. However , Mr. B said , don't date me, keep me for a rainy day. If /when you need someone who can pull some strings, contact me. No strings attached.

It is highly unusual to meet someone who actually offers  genuine help when he knows there is absolutely nothing in it for him in return. Mr.B earned this  blog post because he is a unique example that in spite of having weirdos and liars, snobs and SOBs, you can meet outstanding people where & when  you least expect .

Grandma's dating

I couldn't have lunch without sharing this quick  email encounter with Mr.Dater of the day.

OK , i do have age standards, its written on my profile .Also  I am not in my 20s (nor in my 30s for that matter).

A guy emails me , age below 20, saying في مجال ؟ obliviously , am sane and sensible , so of course  مافي مجال

Moi, being the well mannered person that i am , replied and said No.

Mr. Dater emails me  back saying (لمعلوماتج انا عمري 18 و توني متزوج واحده عمرها 53 سنه متعه ) This is his way of convincing me, the sales pitch .

My thoughts , Arrest Grandma for being a child molester , arrest Mr. Dater for being a pervert.

Grandmas kindly refrain from seducing underage guys. They still take allowance from their daddies. If you are desperate for you know what, ask the  child for daddy's number !

H & K

I praise myself,  I can find almost anything online. It is a  lot of work sometimes but with the help of friends like Google, life gets much easier.

I google everyone & everything. WOuld you be surprised if i said i google phone numbers?  weird , right ?

Mr.Dater sends me an email. My name is H and i am a pilot in Kuwait airways . I have no time to waste, this is my phone number to contact me much easier. I travel all the time (a pilot,of course you travel) . Call me.

Me being the bitchy person that I am and the untrusting pessimist, googled the number.

Results were amazing. I was so proud of myself.  H , isnt a H after all, he is a K, and he works (supposedly) in an oil company. Now, how did i know that ? He has posted comments with his name /phone number on a "adult" dating site. You would say, of course, who wants to comment on pornography with their real name, right? He had also created a profile on a  Business Social Networking site , and his number and the K name  which is the real name. Of course. i just couldn't keep my mouth shut, i am so proud of myself, i  tell Mr.dater 'why would someone lie about their first name'. Mr. Dater 'the internet is full of freaks like you, They go around googling peoples phone numbers'

Moral  of this dating experience: Men lie. Men get caught. Men think we are dumb. I am a freak.

Freak or no freak, you lie to me , you get caught.

Profiles

What  were these guys thinking when they wrote their profiles!

I will start with a (slave profile) for those who read my post about slaves

حياكم الله فى البروفايل منورين
انا شخص عادى شخصيتي ضعيفه وفيني ميول واحب البنت تكون شخصيتها قويه تحب تتحكم فيني وتسوي الى تبيه واكون خاتم في اصبعها واتزوجها وتكون العصمه بيدها واكون كل شي لها وتصير عمتي

بسيط وصريح وهادئ وصبور وكتوم وخلوق وصادق ورومانسي احب الضحك والغشمرة وبنفس الوقت حساس وعلى فكرة احب الشعر ولي محاولات وسلامتكم وتعيشون ... ابي زوجة ثانية ومابي عيال ويفضل تكون عقيم او شايله الرحم

Another profile says :
حياتي بسيطه مابين النادي والدوام والبيت والحين صار وقت المخيمات اروح بعطلة الاسبوع.وحياتي الاجتماعيه يتيم:( واحب الهدوء والسفر طبعا كل ما مليت من روتيني اليومي سافرت.طيب واايد واخلاقي عاليه وما احب اذية الناس كلش وما احب استغل احد بشي ولا اصادق احد علشان مصلحه كلش احب اني اكون دايم انيق باللبس واحب البنت الانيقه واللي اتكون مهتمه بلبسها وشكلها وسلامتكم. اي وسيد بعد اذا تحتاجووون الدعاااء او ماي مقري عليه حاضر:))))

Another profile;

أبي كـرز .. أبي غنــج .. أبي جمره !!
 أبي عشرة عمر .. أبي كيكه ..

slaves

Did  any of you know that slavery is back ? oh yeah , back with a big bang. Not only  do i have one slave or two slaves, I have  three.
So , here i am , on one of the very popular sites known  for users in Kuwait. Browsing for the perfect match , for that profile that will capture my attention and make me  go OMG , the man of my  dreams. (Slave ***) . Mmm , i view the profile , i  get an immediate chat request, I indulge. Who wouldn't ?
I hear the words  every woman wished she could hear every day , all the time"I am your slave mistress".
WTH, Me, mistress, wow. I have a slave . Cool. I will prepare my whip.
The slave wants me to humiliate him, spit on him, whip , spank , beat  and lash . You name any form of abuse and he  wants it from me. I was tempted but , No.
Next. not next profile, next slave. More to follow about my date slaves.

Dating in Q8

So, here i am . Blogging about my favorite topic ever. Dating. Mind you, this is not a blog about dating, its a blog about dating in Kuwait.
Dating in Kuwait, whew, that can be an overwhelming experience. I couldn't just  not share this experience with you. Be warend , some of what i may write will be graphic and disturbing. Some posts will be funny and others will be , whats the word am looking for , mmm, yes , weird.